My Mother and Stepfather were very hard-working parents who spent most of their time building their business in hopes of securing a better future for our family. My mom did the best she could balancing a growing business and three growing children. A task that may prove difficult for most. In order to have more time to focus on expanding the business my parents decided to hire a woman named Jennifer to look after us and take care of the house. As time went on I grew closer to our live-in nanny/housekeeper and somewhat further away from my parents. Success would frequently demand that the young entrepreneurs spend long hours in the office, and take multiple trips overseas.
Auntie Jennifer was hired, but we all soon forgot about that. She was warm and loving and from the Caribbean, so she fit right in. Daily home cooked meals, washed dishes, clean counter tops, shiny floors, neatly folded laundry and spotless wash-rooms. She completed every task perfectly and on time. Until then, I had always associated my mom with the duties of house work and caring for us. Having someone else take her place was very difficult for me and made me feel like she was leaving me to pursue something else once again. It was then that my hurting little heart first entertained the idea of home-making. I began to understand that a mothers role in the house went beyond all the things she physically did. There was a security in her presence that was absent when she was not at home. I admired every single thing about her and I always looked forward to the time we spent together.
By the time I was an adult and starting a family of my own I had a strong sense of my core values. Family time, emotional security and education were at the top of my list as childhood must haves, but would be difficult for me to provide while working a 9 to 5.
The decision to stay home with my children was not a difficult one to make, it seemed like the only way to stay true to what I valued most.
My experience with my mother and auntie Jennifer taught me that just as a house is not a home, there is a significant difference between a house keeper and a home-maker. House keepers maintain the physical structure where a family may dwell and are paid for each shift. Home-makers create an environment where the hearts that dwell in the physical structure are maintained. Payment comes in the form of love and appreciation and the shift never ends. My purpose is first to create a home for my family and then to maintain our house. I desire to provide a place that is safe, and comfortable, where everyone can freely express themselves and feel encouraged to grow into the unique individual that they are. A home is a place where you can always find rest and a place where your heart never truly leaves. Let there be no mistaking a house for a home.
At some point in time when my children reflect on their childhood like I have often done with mine, I want them to have feelings of wholeness and security.
My mother was and still is an amazing example to me, and its my hope to be a better example for my little ones.